The Christmas Debacle of 2008

I have never been very good at buying Mr. Cool presents. He tends to really want items that are way out of the prescribed Christmas budget, so the value items I get tend to not get used that often. Books, DVDs, food dehydrators (but he loves jerky!), are covered with dust.

This year, I was determined to finally get him something big, exciting, and off his list. On Saturday, when I sneakily consulted the list, I saw that a reasonably affordable tool had made it on the list: hand router. Excellent, I thought. I can totally find one of those. So, off I merrily tripped to Harbor Freight, Home Depot, and Lowe's, finally finding the perfect Dremel with a plunge router attachment. I scurried home, wrapped them up, and placed them under the tree.

Upon returning, home, Mr. Cool spotted the presents. "See if you can guess!" I chirped merrily, dripping with Christmas spirit.
"I don't know," he said, carefully eying the wrapped presents. "Maybe a couple books? Unless, it's a hand router."
I began to try to brazen it out, but my unstable emotional state led to me start tearing up. "It is," I said.
"I bought myself one last week," he replied, "I was meaning to tell you."
"A hand router? You bought yourself one?!" I was incredulous and began to cry. And cry.

To Mr. Cool's credit, he felt pretty terrible. I then made him unwrap the gifts, to make sure they were exactly like what he had bought, and that he couldn't use them. He admitted that they were nicer, but that he wouldn't really need or use them. He started to get a little teary.

I took the tools back to the store yesterday. I was really disappointed that the clerk didn't ask me why I was returning them. I wanted to regale her with the story of my lame husband, who buys items less than a month before Christmas that are on his list. "It was a preliminary list!" he said, trying to justify himself. Hmmm. Yeah, right. But what do I get him now? Perhaps I should just give him a duster, so he can keep his old gifts clean.