May 06, 2009

Truer Words Have Never Been Spoken:

In the normal course of my duties at work, it my responsibility to read the current documentation on the "at risk" inmates under my supervision. "At risk" means gang snitch who has a "green light" out on him, suicidal inmates, special needs inmate, medical watches, etc. In the course of my reading, I've come across a phrase that speaks volumes about the body of information available on these subjects"

"Inmate is an unreliable historian."

This always makes me laugh, as I don't expect much of the truth from those I supervise, but this particular phraseology adds a little punch of humor and sarcasm - intentional or not. The type of unreliable historian were talking about here is not the Stephen Ambrose type who regularly failed to cite sources and dabbled in some mild plagiarism, but that kind that screams fibber, fibber, laderhosen ablaze!

"Inmate is an unreliable historian...anything he/she says is to be consider as factual and honest as an episode of Greys Anatomy...words and pleas that pour from their mouth could easily be molded into the back story of Ghost Whisperer and should be considered as total and complete bull."

So, next time someone is giving you a line of total bollocks, just reply in a clinical tone: Sir, I believe you to be an unreliable historian...

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